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Friday, August 04, 2006

It came from Outer spaceness?

Ok, sooo the road where I live has a road with exactly the same name but a slightly different postcode about half a mile away. Now, the postman and delivery people all know this, but couriers from different countries don't. I've been delivered stuff before from say an American carrier such as UPS or a French courier such as FroggyExpress or a whatever courier, when it should have gone to the other address.

Of course I've always put it to one side, but, it's never been picked up by it's rightfull owners.

One day I'll get around to dropping the stuff off, but it's a difficult road to get to unless you use a cab, and to be honest I just don't have the time/can't be arsed.

Alrighty. Soooo I get a knock on the door at about 9 this morning and it's some unkown courier guy from a company I've never heard of and he's like: "Delivery for Mr Weinstein," and I'm like: "I'm not Mr Weinstein mate?"

Anyway before I know it, he's rattled off my address said some other shit about delivering to the right address, said that he's "Not taking it back now sonny!" and wheeled in a huge custom made Smeg Fridge like this one:

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Then he's just disappeared...as if by magic?

And...without me even signing for the fukin thing??

Sooo, now it sits in my hallway?

In all it's silver spaceship like fridgen/freezerness saying: "Install me, I need love!!"

And I'm thinking: "Yes, I really could love you, and so could my groceries...and my kitchen colour sheme!"

Ho-hum, what to do?

Can you see where I'm going with this?

I'm not being funny, but coz I didn't sign anything, I'm sorely tempted to just ride this one out for a month or so and if there's no backlash, Just keep the damn thing!

I mean they gave it to me, so It's not like I'm teafing it. Am I?

Anyway, in the meantime, I'm just gonna let it sit here for a while, in the hallway!

And..

I'm very sorry Mr Weinstein, but I've been in the music business for a lot years and you lot have taken me to the cleaners on several occasions (not an antisemetic statement in any way. Just the truth!)

Soooo...it's about time you lot bought me a shiny new sodding Fidge/freezer!!

Hmmm!

Yours,

Sooo fukin dishonestly... Your honor.

Lch!

Don't worry, I'll trace the owner!

Ok, tonight I have the club to run and then tomorrow or Sunday (not sure yet) Sweedy girls coming to stay, till Tues I think.

So don't expect any posts till then,

Coz there ain't gonna be any.

Oh and for anybody who's wondering, my fingers ok, but a bit sore with a big chunk missing from yesterdays razor blade incident!

Airforce repair orders...Funny!

And why not?

Funny Christmas message, wrong season but hey!

Ok

Laters

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5 Comments:

Blogger ukfella_1 said...

fukin jingle bells. brown trousers here thanks (volume toooooo loud!).

ukfella

11:48 am  
Blogger what's_my_line? said...

I'm trying not to laugh my ass of at work because of those repair orders. Too funny.

2:07 pm  
Blogger China Blue said...

Looks like Christmas has arrived early for you! I say, don't worry about people who can buy a Smeg fridge... they can take care of themselves!

11:14 am  
Blogger london cokehead said...

UK: Ha!!

WML:Aren't they just.

CB: It's still standing in the hallway , and the general consensus is "Keep the fukin thing!"

11:57 am  
Blogger what's_my_line? said...

Better take it in before your theiving neighbors get their paws on it.

12:04 am  

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