Observations from Wales

Observations from Wales following a Welsh gig last night.

1. Welsh people are mad.
2. The Smoking ban and being with a band all night ( who can no longer smoke on stage, in the dressing room etc .etc. etc ) is a recipe for a fukin nightmare.
3. Working within a smoking prohibited venue fucking sucks!!! I mean, a backstage smoke free dressing room? Where's the rock n roll in that. If I wanted to have a clean living, healthy lifestyle, I wouldn't be involved with fukin music would I??? We all just sat there twiddling our fukin thumbs!
   
4. Welsh people are mad.
5. Don't park your tour bus in a non tour bus parking area, coz it will get clamped and you will have to pay £200 to get it released.
6. Welsh girls are fit...but mad!!
7. Don't arm wrestle your mate on a bands flightcases as they're trying to unload them from a venue at 3am, then get pissed off when you get kicked out the way. Sorry...you wanna arm wrestle your pissed mate, we wanna go home!! You won't win!!
8. Just coz you're pissed off the bands lead singer ain't turned up, has had to be replaced last minute, and your an old fan, it still doesn't give you the right to start smashing up the side of the tour bus with a spanner/wrench/chain/hammer/whateverthefuckitwass??? Special note to this bloke: If the rest of the crew had been outside and not just the tour manager, you would have soooo woken up in hospital this morning mate... Fact!!
   
9. Welsh people are truly mad.
10. Don't sit in the rearward facing seat on a tour bus in front of a table full of beer, spirits etc! This is especially true if the tour bus brakes are applied liberally in a " Oh shit we've missed the turn off!!" kind of way. ( I got fukin drenched!!)
11. Don't ever mistake a line of coke, for a line of cat piss strong, heavy duty base speed. You won't sleep much!
12. Try to always do gigs where the in-house engineer is soooo bad, that when your band goes on stage they sound absolutely fukin amazing ( I like this one)
13. If you must do a few tunes with the band following an Ableton live backing track, don't hit the warp button, cos the track wiiiillllll plaaaaaaayyy reaaaaalllyyyy fukiiiiinnnnn sloooooowwwwwlllyyy and the band will loooook like theeeey're plaaaying in slooooooow moooootioooonn!!! Funny as fuck to watch though, none of them [the band] could work out what the fuck was going on. I'm sure they all thought they'd been spiked with acid, I mean at one point I thought I had, coz I couldn't work it out either? These things are sent to test us I guess.
    
14. Welsh people are mad ( as fish!)
    

Bit of a mad little gig that one, awesome (did I really just use that word) Logic line array sound system, we totally rocked it as well.

Quote of the night ( Tour manager and driver ) : " I'm not a fucking taxi service you know!!"

Err yes, yes you are???

I sooo could've stayed up there instead of traveling back last night (one of the band actually did) There were girls hitting on us left, right and centre.

Got home at around 6am, now I'm up again, have a few hours to kill and I'm going back to work ( at the club ) at around 7pm.

No rest for the wicked eh?

Talking of gigs, the Worlds most hypocritical set of gigs have just kicked off. Any musician who claims to be environmentally friendly is talking so much shit you can virtually smell it.

I've said it before but... Carting tour buses and huge lighting/sound rigs around the world and then burning enough petrol/diesel to power the kind of generators needed to make that stuff work ain't in the least bit green. The average sized festival stage generator produces enough power to light up a small village and the some?

Note to Sting, Coldplay, Radiohead, Madonna, Paul McCartney etc etc. etc: How many fukin bits of plastic have you sold in your green fukin careers? Considering you're just Solo Artists/Groups of blokes from Cambridge etc. You lot generate more waste in a year than your average household would produce in like, 1000 lifetimes.

Live Earth= Money generating bollocks!

Hmmm!

Yes... How can it fly??

lol!!

Mad stop motion shit.

Laters