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Monday, July 02, 2007

Free house...Errr OK!!!

Sooo: Talk about landing on your fukin feet. My landlady is selling the house we live in coz she wants to move back to Ireland, but ( and it's a huge but ) she still wants to have a base in London so she can visit once or twice a year and... she wants me to find it and look after it for her.

"So what?" You say. Well, my landlady's a bit of an old mad eccentric, she never opens her mail and she avoids issues like the plague ( her flat is a fukin tip ) . This is finally starting to land her in a lot of financial shit, thus the move back to Ireland; It's a kinda running away and dumping dept thing, which ain't really that hard to do if you can skip countries.

But...if she buys a new house in her name she can then be tracked and caught. Sooo ( and this is the good bit ) She wants to put her new house in my name????

Totally fukin mad idea, but...!

I (obviously) have absolutely no fukin problem with this¿

At all!!

She's old, she has no family and she kinda considers me as her surrogate son. I've looked after her for a good few years now and I've always been there when she's needed a shoulder to cry on and besides, my parents are both long gone so it's kinda nice to have somebody you can call family.

And...No I'm not fukin sleeping with her!

Anyway, she'll sell the house we live in ( Which is worth about 1.5 million ) split the money, buy one house in Ireland, then leave me to spend £400,000 on another in London!

I've actually known about this for a couple of months now, but she's sooo bloody eccentric that I took not one blind bit of notice. Until, that is, this morning when a couple of property developers turned up to view the house.

Fuck me; I've gotta feeling this is actually gonna happen?? Which begs the question, " When she pops her clogs and the house is in my name, then surely it'll be my house?" I'll get some advice, but I think that plain and simply, it'll be the case

Lippy-lipsticklawyer If your reading, now would be a good time to speak up dear!

Soo what happens next is anyones guess. If she does sell and I'm left to buy, I'm going straight to the property auctions for a bargain.

Mad how even with £400,000 to play with in London you still have to look for bargains???

So yeah, well see.

I ain't gonna get excited yet tho, counting chickens an' all that.


I went to a garden party that one of the locals from the pub was throwing yesterday. It was a kind of " If we can't smoke in the pub, then well damn well smoke at fukin home!!" party. About 50 of us chipped in money, hired a cocktail barman and then got thoroughly slaughtered on exotic cocktails. It was actually a load of fun and now we're thinking about doing it a couple of times a month at various locations.

Fuck the ban, fuck the government, you can't stop us, we're bloody English you know !

The pub remained empty all afternoon seemingly.

I can't see Tom the landlord being too impressed though.

An iconic story!

Computer programmer or serial killer?

Fun...but useless!



Blogger Nobody Girl said...

You jammy sod! There must be a catch??

11:36 am  
Blogger Jo said...

£400,000...that'll be a one bedroom flat in Peckham, then? ;)

1:02 pm  
Blogger Lippy said...

Well if she puts it in your name but she gives you the money then technically she has an equitable interest known as a "Resulting trust" over the value in the house - so if you and she fell out she could take you to court and force you to sell it and give her the money back.

What happens when she dies - depends on her will. For you to be 100% secure she would need to leave you any interest that she retains in the will. Otherwise if she leaves "Her entire estate" to someone else then - if they knew about the money being used to provide the house - they could run the "Resulting trust" argument and force a sale.

Much however depends on the intention which you and she have regarding the property - is it intended to be an investment for her which you will hold as a tax dodge. Or is it in effect intended to be a gift to you ?? - this would be best as it would has the potential to be a tax free gift to you if she lives for 7 years and then dies. Would be good if she would write you a letter setting out what she is intending.

So there you go. You can buy my a beer for that one!

5:38 pm  
Blogger london cokehead said...

THanks lippy, I owe you :0)

11:22 pm  

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