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Saturday, August 27, 2005

Top Secret ( eyes only ) ..

Primary Target : Ladbroke Grove ..West London ..

Weapons : 2 grammes charlie , big bag of pills , 1 gramme MDMA , 1 ounce superskunk

Mission : Arrive with stash , take stash .. Partake in various forms of entertainment , joyous frolicing and mingling with the natives ..

Objective : To get plastered ..

Troops : 1 Londoncokehead + 1 Little Mistress

Reconnaissance : Bring back pictures of above said entertainment ....

Your mission if you choose to accept , will be a dangerously large sesh and a shit load of fun ...


Yes it's the time of the year when every man , woman and soundsystem crawl out of West Londons woodwork ..

Where your eyes turn to jelly and you body gets shaken to bits by sub-base so loud that all you fillings fall out and you poo your pants ( if your not carefull ) ..

Where the police try and be nice ( to avoid being filled in ) , and the women shake their booties so hard that if they were in water they'd cause a tiddle wave ... Splooosh !

Where the food is sooo damn hot that it's in danger of setting light to the atmosphere ( you crazy Jerky chicken people ) ..

And the Rum is so potent that it evaporates before it leaves the fukin bottle ..


The party of the year ...

I took an Aussie bird to carnival last year and she winged the whole time .. That'll teach you to wear hi-heels at a public event dear !!

Silly cow , not a nice girl that one , I took her out all summer to fancy restaurants and clubs and she never paid a penny . Then in Sept I was a bit skint ... I was investing heavily in a new project at the time and all my money was tied up , so I told her that I wouldn't be taking her out for a couple of weeks and she dumped me on the spot ... Fucker ..

Glad I realised then before she took me to the cleaners !!

Yeah she wouldn't return my calls or anything ..

So I sent her a huge bouquet of flowers with a lovely note : Dear Barmaid ... Find somefucker else's money to spend ... Lot of love ******

I certainly can pick um ....

Right I'm off to paaaaaaarrrrrttttttyyyyyyyy !

See ya all on Tuesday ( or Wednesday ) ...

Also in the mind boggling London cokehead up to the minute no holds barred news report ...

Those MIT genius's have done it again with ...


No fukn comment !!


Blogger Doom/Blondie said...

I'll see you among the 2,000,000 or so.

Look for me in a pair of white adidas

1:26 pm  
Blogger LeeLoreya said...

human jell-o is what it's called.



enjoy -

2:07 pm  
Blogger Paige said...

Little Mistress is a lucky lady!

I want a carnival to happen in my London...!

2:18 pm  
Blogger sheriff of nothing said...

Have a good one!

Watch out for us Aussie chicks we can be dangerous!

12:32 am  
Blogger london cokehead said...

Nothing against Aussie chicks in general mate ...

Just her ...damn ..

1:00 am  
Blogger ty bluesmith said...

dear, barmaid.


1:31 am  
Blogger mr. tomas ubik said...

i want in on this .... damnit.... im gonna make my own carnival, and sure itll start slow, but by 2018 youll be flying to ontario with a party hat and bells on.

ya hear me...bells damnit.!!!

4:15 pm  

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