Studio's and fine wine ...
Soo , I spoke on the phone ( hospital bedside ) to my mate L last night , she seems OK after being hit by a taxi , she sounds really down though ,, She seems to be more bothered about cancelling the tour then about being fucked up ...
She has , 1 broken arm , 1 broken back , 1 smashed pelvis , 1 metal plate in smashed pelvis , lots of stitches/staples in her head , 1 frame that is sorta holding her all together and a sore bum ...
Aww , poor dear , at least she's still alive ..
L's a lot of fun , as you probably saw in her website
She's one strange character though , only girl I know with an Alter in the front room , not really normal behaviour that one kid!!
I'm sure Cosmos the cat likes it though ..
We went to a party once , at this Studio launch in West London .. We'd had a huge row outside , can't remember what about , but we were sorta seeing each other at the time ..
Anyway , She's grabbed the nearest good looking bloke at the party , taken him in the toilets and shagged his brains out to make me jealous ( as one does !! ) , told you she's strange ..
And i've just thought " fuck this " , found the nearest comfy couch , the first bottle of alchohol to hand ( a bottle of red wine ) , de-corked it and swigged the whole bottle from the neck in about a minute , I'm in a real bad fukin mood here people ..
Sooo , now i'm pissed .. The Owner of the studio storms up to me and say's , " what the fuck happened to that bottle of fukin wine mate " ...
Me , " I donknow I fukin dwank it I twinks smate "
Him , " What do you mean you fukin drank it "
Me , " Errr like I fukin pwut the bottley thingy to smy lips and "
Him , " You fukin twaty fukin cunt "
He and his security bods , pick me up and throw me down the stairs and out of the party "
I'm confused , really pissed but still in one piece ..
I go home , tail between my legs ...
Turns out that the innocent bottle of red just happened to be a bottle of Chateau Mouton Rothschild 1961 pauillac ... ( try saying that when your pissed ... )
Woops , thats err only about £2000 ( $3600 US ) worth of plonk to you and me , and I've swigged it down in under a minute ..
O dear , O dear in deedy ..
I ring the studio , grovel , and get exploded at over the phone ...
What else can you do !!
Note to self : Always check the fukin label mate ...
After that L is no longer my gwirl , which is good because she ( after a while ) turned out to be one of my best friends ...
Sooo , get well soon L , cos the world's a better place with you onboard babe ...
Going to the gym ...
Russian Stalker E-mail of the day :
IT IS VERY PITY,THAT You Do not WANT TO TALK WITH ME!!!!!!! IT IS VERY STRANGE !!! WHY???
Errr , no real reason dear !!!
Listening to : Chan Chan ( Buena Vista Social Club ) ... I still love this album , fell asleep when I watched the film though .. ( but have seen it since , in three different languages , love it ) ..
Out the door !!
She has , 1 broken arm , 1 broken back , 1 smashed pelvis , 1 metal plate in smashed pelvis , lots of stitches/staples in her head , 1 frame that is sorta holding her all together and a sore bum ...
Aww , poor dear , at least she's still alive ..
L's a lot of fun , as you probably saw in her website
She's one strange character though , only girl I know with an Alter in the front room , not really normal behaviour that one kid!!
I'm sure Cosmos the cat likes it though ..
We went to a party once , at this Studio launch in West London .. We'd had a huge row outside , can't remember what about , but we were sorta seeing each other at the time ..
Anyway , She's grabbed the nearest good looking bloke at the party , taken him in the toilets and shagged his brains out to make me jealous ( as one does !! ) , told you she's strange ..
And i've just thought " fuck this " , found the nearest comfy couch , the first bottle of alchohol to hand ( a bottle of red wine ) , de-corked it and swigged the whole bottle from the neck in about a minute , I'm in a real bad fukin mood here people ..
Sooo , now i'm pissed .. The Owner of the studio storms up to me and say's , " what the fuck happened to that bottle of fukin wine mate " ...
Me , " I donknow I fukin dwank it I twinks smate "
Him , " What do you mean you fukin drank it "
Me , " Errr like I fukin pwut the bottley thingy to smy lips and "
Him , " You fukin twaty fukin cunt "
He and his security bods , pick me up and throw me down the stairs and out of the party "
I'm confused , really pissed but still in one piece ..
I go home , tail between my legs ...
Turns out that the innocent bottle of red just happened to be a bottle of Chateau Mouton Rothschild 1961 pauillac ... ( try saying that when your pissed ... )
Woops , thats err only about £2000 ( $3600 US ) worth of plonk to you and me , and I've swigged it down in under a minute ..
O dear , O dear in deedy ..
I ring the studio , grovel , and get exploded at over the phone ...
What else can you do !!
Note to self : Always check the fukin label mate ...
After that L is no longer my gwirl , which is good because she ( after a while ) turned out to be one of my best friends ...
Sooo , get well soon L , cos the world's a better place with you onboard babe ...
Going to the gym ...
Russian Stalker E-mail of the day :
IT IS VERY PITY,THAT You Do not WANT TO TALK WITH ME!!!!!!! IT IS VERY STRANGE !!! WHY???
Errr , no real reason dear !!!
Listening to : Chan Chan ( Buena Vista Social Club ) ... I still love this album , fell asleep when I watched the film though .. ( but have seen it since , in three different languages , love it ) ..
Out the door !!
posted by london cokehead at 12:06 pm
4 Comments:
they invented lockers for ice cream pints, they could do the same for expensive wine.
hope your friend Elle the Strange will get her body stitched together soon.
you should hire a Professional Annoyer to send daily exclamation mark loaded emails to R.S. in russian.
Holy shit, Batman. That bottle of wine was worth more than the entire GDP of Zimbabwe. It's a wonder the bouncers didn't turn you into human pretzel. On the other hand, about 99% of the blame must to go to your friend for her erotic lobotomy stunt.
good thing you did drink it, or that tumble down the flight of stairs may have a been a bit more memorable...mangled while mangled is never as bad.
What a great fucking post....reminded me of me in the '80's. Had a moment like that once with a certain bottle of champagne that the beau and I drank without looking at the label. Whoops.
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